Trials and Tribulations

This topic came up today in Church, indirectly, through a topic on 'Why we have children'. Don't ask me how it got there- I wasn't quite listening to the whole session as my mind was jumping from one thought to the next.

tri·al [trahy-uhl, trahyl]

–noun
1. Law.
a. the examination before a judicial tribunal of the facts put in issue in a cause, often including issues of law as well as those of fact.
b. the determination of a person's guilt or innocence by due process of law.

2. the act of trying, testing, or putting to the proof.

3. test; proof.

4. an attempt or effort to do something.



trib·u·la·tion [trib-yuh-ley-shuhn]


–noun
1. grievous trouble; severe trial or suffering.

2. An instance of this; an affliction, trouble, etc.



Generally, I am afraid of stuffing up. I'm afraid of the embarrassment and humiliation it can cause, as well as the self doubt it can instill within me. I typically try to play everything safe, and even avoid confrontations in the hope that I can slide on by under the radar.

Life is a trial, a test, the final exam that will ultimately prove to ourselves, those around us and Heavenly Father that we are worth of immortality. The whole plan for us is to undertake these trials, understand them and overcome them.

Much like the story of Adam and Eve, we too need to experience 'wrong' in order to know what is right. By constantly playing the safe game and flying under the radar, I have not had the opportunity to correct my own downfalls.
Not to say I've never had to face any trials. This would be completely untrue and quite impossible. Though, I do believe I take the easy road out a lot of the times in order to save myself from confrontations. Does that make sense?

Melodie and I have, in the past, had to overcome some serious trials through our relationship. In fact, only last night we were discussing the history of 'us' and she brought up the fact that I think our relationship has been pretty easy going... Which is the truth, according to me.
However, she explained to me that that is most certainly not the case, and that she had to make some tough, executive decision very early on in our relationship. Example, the fact that she would not be married in a temple as I was not a member when he had first talked of marriage and weddings etc. At the time, it was no big deal to me where or how I were to be married, so long as it was to the woman I loved.
Again, when it came down close to the time that I was going to propose, she had to question herself and see if this is what she really wanted. Her love for me was such that she potentially sacrificed a temple wedding, as well as being sealed, for the love and trust she had in me.

Nothing comes close to the trial that was faced on those occasions.

the act of trying, testing, or putting to the proof.

To put me ahead of her own wants and needs proves the unconditional love, the bond, between us. That trial was a stepping stone in building her own character.


That was just an example of her trial. Recently, we have had a trial between us that could have kept us together, or demolished everything we had built together. A ten month long distant relationship. Thankfully, the love that was just mentioned allowed that bond to stay in place.
We have a long road ahead of us, and bumps are going to occur, much like riffs between siblings, children, parents and friends.

I think of our situation as Hurricane Katrina which tore through New Orleans in 2005. The hurricane caused widespread damage to much of the city, demolished people's homes, took lives and emptied the morale of the once vibrant city. Giving up was never an option. Some people left the city to find elsewhere to live in another city, or even state. Those who truly loved the city of New Orleans wanted to stay, to help rebuild the foundations of the city and to hopefully, one day, enjoy the vibes that New Orleans is known for.
There is a very good chance that another, more devastating hurricane, could tear through the city again and cause even more damage and death than previously. This is not a concern for those who have true love for their city because they were there. They were there when times were tough to rebuild what had been taken away from them. They were there to give their all, even when they had absolutely nothing, and it seemed like they had no way of survival.

The past ten months has been like a constant hurricane in our relationship. Causing widespread damage to the foundation of our relationship. Melodie and I are not relocating. We are not leaving one another to look for something more safe, and easier to endure. We have a lot of work ahead of us, but, we have time and love on our side.

We know what is important and we know that this trial is a stepping stone in the building of our characteristics as Husband and Wife.